BEEP BEEP (:

Confirmation

2010-05-16T11:06:00.000-07:00

The end of the beginning.

After 10 years of my life, today was the day where I finally found out why I struggled to wake myself up every sunday morning. Yep.

Gonna miss it, now I feel as if a part of my life is missing, but whatever the case, the pink family won't die out, right? :)

Haha, havent been blogging for ages, due to midyears and all, gonna continue soon :)

Okay, bedtime, nights :D

~Zenobius~

:/

2010-03-09T08:38:00.000-08:00

School sucks balls man. Plenty of commitment and other nonsense.

Really tired now, Dammit, where's my holidays? Oh that's right, 1 week away. FML.

Ah well. Okay feel really down now, so just gonna sleep it off, Nights!

~ShauN~

fml

2010-03-08T09:50:00.000-08:00

Today, I left school early as I was sick, and ending up to find out that Paramore left, and that no one got for me my autograph from hayley. FML.

~ShauN~

Zzz

2010-03-07T08:31:00.000-08:00

PARAMORE WAS AWESOME, but missed them at the oriental hotel. and I can't send them off tomorrow because I've school :( Sorry guys :(

~ShauN~

:/

2010-03-06T11:09:00.000-08:00

missed paramore and their flight. DAMMIT. :(

~ShauN~

Rawr

2010-02-23T10:17:00.000-08:00

Okay gonna make a quick update, I MAY consider doing a full band cover of me doing Rise Against's Historia Calamitatum.

When it rains it pours
Like summer storms, the skies as grey as leaves.
The rivers flood the banks and spill into the streets.
But the people laughed and swore that they'd restore
The city piece by piece.
And then the clouds gave way as if to agree;
When it rains it pours.

Yeah, full band of me means that I'll combined several videos of me playing different instruments together, how awesome. Gonna start with drumming as that is usually the hardest part first. Want it to be as accurate as possible. Haha.

Calluses on my fingers sucks, feels so dead, next time gotta get lighter strings.

I hatehatehatehate doing 10-year-series books, but hey, it's the only way to an A1.

Shit, look at the time, 220am, gonna go sleep. nights! :D

~ShauN~

oh yeah!

2010-02-22T06:33:00.001-08:00

Damn, months passing real quick, before you know it, i'll be moving out of here soon :/

But, good news, I'm getting a dog at my new house! As well as maybe a PS3, about time I get some good consoles, though my com is already godly enough, running almost any game at max settings maintaining an average of 60-80 frames per second, dang, lucky me. :D

Well, just got warned about me being in some blacklist thing, hot damn, gotta stop screwing around in school already, before the screwed becomes the screwed. Suckthesac. :/

Meh, sorry 'bout not really updating since BLG, it was awesome, just was really lazy to do updates after that, would be popping in now and then again though.

Diediedie, gotta pick a confirmation name by 2weeks time, was considering Zephyr, but not even sure if it's in the bible, sounds pretty bible-ish to me though, or Silas, I know I can pick that, gah. Sigh, decisions, decisions. :/

Noticed I put lots of :/'s today LOL.

Must be the monday blues.

Yep, must be.

Rah, gonna go touch up some work, then snooze, ciao people! :D

~ShauN~

:D

2010-01-27T09:16:00.000-08:00

Because in 18hours time, it's just gonna be Me, You and My Medication. :D

BOYS LIKE GIRLS IS INNNN :D

Okay, so today was kinda boring, yeah, DC and crap, almost had another one because i supposedly "skipped" adc, screw the school, ah well. My talking made them finally gave up and waived it i guess :D

Yeah, gotta catch up on sleep, BLG :D

Nights! :D

~ShauN~

I'm off

2010-01-21T08:29:00.001-08:00

I'm off to effing somewhere near Pasir Ris. FML much?

This sucks man, 16 years of my life. :/

Now I'm moving to beng/lian heaven and failure housing.

This is the ONLY plan I'm going against my parents, they don't have ANY support at all. :/

Right now, I'm trying to wonder is there ANY way to get out of this shit?

God, help me, you can't pangseh me at this time, especially now :'(

~ShauN~

we'll sing this symphony of sympathy.

2010-01-17T06:17:00.000-08:00

Our legs begin to break
We've walked this path for far too long
My lungs, they start to ache
But still we carry on
I'm choking on my words
Like I got a noose around my neck
I can't believe it's come to this
I can't believe it's come to this
And dear, I fear
That this ship is sinking tonight

I won't give up on you
These scars won't tear us apart
So don't give up on me
It's not too late for us
And I'll save you from yourself
And I'll save you from yourself

Our legs begin to break
We've walked this path for far too long
My lungs begin to ache
But still we carry on
I'm choking on my words
Like I got a noose around my neck

I'm not coming home tonight
I'm not coming home tonight
'Cause dear I fear, dear I fear
I'm not coming home tonight
I'm not coming home tonight
'Cause dear I fear
This ship is sinking
Is there hope for us?
Can we make it out alive?
I can taste the failure on your lips
Is there hope for us?
Can we make it out alive?
I can taste the failure

Close your eyes
There's nothing we can do
But sleep in this bed that we made for ourselves
You're trapped in your past
Like it's six feet under

I won't give up on you
These scars won't tear us apart
So don't give up on me
It's not too late for us
I'll save you from yourself
I'll save you from yourself
I'll save you from yourself
I'll save you from yourself

Try to numb the pain
With alcohol and pills
But it won't repair your trust
You can't stand on two fucking feet
With a substance as a crutch

I won't give up
I won't give up on you
We'll sing this symphony
I won't give up
I won't give up on you
We'll sing this symphony of sympathy

I won't give up
I won't give up on you
We'll sing this symphony of sympathy
I won't give up
I won't give up on you
We'll sing this symphony of sympathy

I'll sing it by myself.

~ShauN~

WOOH

2010-01-15T11:21:00.000-08:00

Finalleh, recorded the demo we're gonna use for BayBeats auditions 2010, here we come!

Took about 2 hours, so I spend basically 18hours out of the house today, God give me nice rest :D

Yep, so it was school, recording, church, then home, jesus christ. :/

Kk, got lotsa plans tomorrow too, bye :D

~ShauN~

:/

2010-01-12T08:49:00.000-08:00

I just found out that I'm gonna be moving house by June. Yeah, overnight decision, either that or they didnt tell me, ah well.

Sigh, leaving behind 15+ years of childhood just to move, wth. I don't wanna leave LP ever :(

Worse, there's no place like here, all either too small or too expensive, dammit.

Can't I just stay here? Not like my parents will be around by the time this place runs out of its 99 years thing.

:/

Goodbye everyone :(

~ShauN~

Rawr

2010-01-07T11:01:00.001-08:00

Like to congratulate Alyson Hannigan for winning the People's Choice Award for Best Comedy Actress. Though she wouldn't see this as she'll be using her twitter and stuff LOL.

Hmm okay, boring school, boring week :(

Nights.

~ShauN~

Little change of the heart.

2010-01-02T11:27:00.001-08:00

Love this song up there, give it a hear, off Boys Like Girls new album Love Drunk.

One of the most soulful acoustic songs which I've ever heard. Lyrics coming to life. Everything fits.

And it's so true. Makes me think alot about life :)

Nothing much to post, gonna go mass tomorrow, bye blog :)

~ShauN~

The Reverend Tholomew Plague

2009-12-30T11:12:00.000-08:00

Yup, technically today, is the eve of the end of 2009, amazing year, amazing achievements, amazing doors I never knew I open.

2009 taught me MANY lessons, treasuring life being one of the first few.

with the year of 2009 coming to an end, it brought many deaths among famous stars such as Michael Jackson, Henry Gibson, and James "The Rev" Owen Sullivan. Dying a natural death.

Irony may appear strong, but up above in that music video, was one of The Rev's most famous work, which he wrote all by himself, about not wanting to be in the Afterlife as he still had much more things to do on earth, irony aside, listen to it.

R.I.P

James "The Rev" Owen Sullivan, Aged 28, passed away on 28th December 2009, up till now, death cause was appeared as "Natural".

Such a surreal place to see, so how did this come to be? I arrived too early.

an AMAZING year, thanks everyone who made it what it was :)

I've a new years resolution, yep, just one, you guessed it,

Note:
SHAUN, LOOK AT THIS NOTE 6MONTHS IN THE FUTURE, WHEN YOUR IN BAYBEATS 2010, LOOK BACK, AND SMILE AT THIS :)

Yeah, that's it.

Got nothing against you, but surely I'll miss you, This place's full of peace and light, And I'd hope you might, take me back inside, when the time is right.

~ShauN~

Booya!

2009-12-27T09:56:00.000-08:00

Damnn, I'm back blogging, as I've REALLY nothing to do. Sigh, holidays ending soon, yet so fast, it was fun till today, everyday is something new :D

Highlights include:

-Doug being called cute when he accidentally sprayed fake snow all over a beng's shirt.
-Dip and his overkills, with "frozen things on frozen throne" being the top.
-Reaching out to try and "feel" the screen with Douglas when watching Avatar 3-D.
-Catching H1N1 and wasted 5days in Hong Kong Disneyland sleeping in bed.
-Having my com break down and reinstalling windows 3 times in 2 days.
-Learning at least 15new songs regardless of my packed timetable.
-1 new hero in HoN and 2 new heroes in DotA.
-Finishing HIMYM till season 4.
-Being treated by Darren to AMAZING seafood.
-Party after party.
-Playing monopoly till 5am in the morning.
-New clothes.
-So many more, will add to this list as soon as I remember :P

Yup, so yeah, Goodbye Holidays, I'll miss you :(

Kk gonna go sleep. Nightos! :D

~ShauN~

Hell yeah!

2009-12-16T12:41:00.000-08:00

I just want to be better than your
your head's only medicine
I just want to be better than your
your head's only medicine

A downward spiral just a pirouette
G-g-getting worse til there's n-n-nothing left
What good comes of something when I'm
just the ghost of nothing, nothing

'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees

(for a)
Lunatic of a god or a god of a lunatic?
Oh, their faces are dancing
They're dancing til
Til they can't stand it
A composer but never composed
Singing the symphonies of the overdosed
A composer but never composed

'Singing':
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't have"

Heralded as a king before I had a birthday
with double digits
Fit the crown to my head but I was only a kid
yeah I was only a kid
yeah I was only a kid

'Hey!'
'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees

Lunatic of a god or a god of a lunatic?
Oh, their faces are dancing
They're dancing til
Til they can't stand it
A composer but never composed
Singing the symphonies of the overdosed
A composer but never composed

'Singing':
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't I can't have"

'...to be better than your, your head's only medicine'
'I just want to be better than your, your head's only medicine'

'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees

'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees

Lunatic of a god or a god of a lunatic?
Oh, their faces are dancing
They're dancing til
Til they can't stand it
A composer but never composed
Singing the symphonies of the overdosed
A composer but never composed

'Singing'
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't have"
"I only want what I can't, I can't have"

I only want what I can't have.

FINALLY, no more H1N1, and havent been updating recently, ah well, :P

Lazy, and my computer is going all screwy on me, she has feelings too I guess :P

Up above there is an AMAZING song, Fall Out Boy's last song before their hiatus for god-knows-how-long, it has extended 3mins of nothing for I have no idea what either ._.

Yup, kk update fully next time soon, its 5am here, nights! :D

~ShauN~

fml.

2009-11-25T08:28:00.000-08:00

fml. i just realised that i'm getting my fever and shit from tonsillitis. :/

sigh, hope i won't need a frigging operation. :/

tired and sick as hell :(

gonna sleep soon, nights :)

~ShauN~

No place warmer.

2009-11-24T00:41:00.000-08:00

Woot!

I'm back in Singapore :D

Never thought I'd miss the hot air so much LOL.

4 days in Hong Kong wasted, just fell sick, hotel room everyday, sigh.Sorry guys :/

Well, back in Singapore, I swear, next time I'm going overseas, I'm heading for a warmer country, Africa anyone? :D

Internet failing on me now, zzz.

Okay, gonna catch up with my com again, and finish up my medication, before my fever goes back to 39+ degrees.

Yow.

Ah well, always knew I was HOT. LOL.

Jokes aside, HoN calls me. CIAO! :D

~ShauN~

Huphuphup to HK

2009-11-20T09:11:00.001-08:00

Okay, I'm leaving for Hong Kong in about.. 4 hours.

Yup. Erm, I'm lazy to send out SMSes, so if you guys wanna see what I actually wanted to send, it's here I guess.

Bringing my webcam for the fun of it, will be Facebooking once in awhile if I've internet and I'm free there :D

Yeah, gonna go shop my ass off though it aint expected of me.

And yup, of course gonna pray I don't get motion sickness from the plane :/

Will miss my Razer family, my Godly com, my lovely bed and my lovely friends :D and of course, you.
Haha, yup, shacked as hell, will be coming back on Wed 25th, not sure about the time, might run into reuben at the airport on his way back from texas too, haha. Okay. update when I'm in HongKong, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

Holy SHIT.

2009-11-18T09:10:00.001-08:00

Holy shit, guys like him in the video make me wanna just quit and drop my guitar and go back to playing rubber bands on tissue boxes. That's amazing. No slips, no string mutings, absolutely perfect :D

Hmm, leaving for hong kong soon, hopefully i'll finish recording something by then, lazy to continue.

Oh yeah, my com has been PMSing crazily on me. Annoying stuff.

Missing a few important files for my windows system, all of a sudden, LOL.

Yeah, gonna continue packing, then go sleep shortly, i cant sleep properly :/

So yup, nights!

~ShauN~

RAWR

2009-11-15T07:55:00.000-08:00

okayokay, missed out alot :X

so carnival was quite good and fun, but NOTHING compared to 2007's :D

Yupyup, and woot, found my old pokemon monopoly set HAHAHA, played a two player round with darren, and lost because of the "Pokemon Ability" rule >:/

Okay I know I'm lame, but it was quite fun :D

Hmm, what else,

OH YEAH, I've starting recording on Love Drunk, Six Feet Under The Stars and Heaven Can Wait, gonna take some time, but at least getting stuff done.

And 2weeks into the holiday, not bad, haha, but wish it was longer, feels so short all of a sudden compared to last year -.-

Been feeling so tired recently, and in the carnival, I got a tan :D

After wading in the Hamster Ball pool for almost more than half the day -.-

Yup, and just chilling out now, hoping to jam this friday before i leave for Hong Kong on saturday morning, haha.

Okay, gonna go sleep soon, dental appointment tomorrow, bye! :D

~ShauN~

PSR INCREASE! :D

2009-11-09T08:16:00.000-08:00

HELL YEAH, I JUST FINISHED 3 GAMES STRAIGHT OF HON AND WON ALL WITH DIP IN MY TEAM, ACHIEVEMENT FTW.

LOL.

Okay, i needa wrap this up fast, wanna wake up early tomorrow, and i'm considering dyeing my hair :P

hmm..

ahh, a nice bright red, but i'm fringeless, so it's kinda stupid :X

okay tired, nights! :D

and i'm gonna keep on moving forward, 'cause moving backwards would just be abandoning my will.

~ShauN~

LOL

2009-11-07T09:33:00.000-08:00

EVERYDAY SO DAMN TIRED, SO NIGHTS! :D

~ShauN~

lightning bolts.

2009-11-06T08:54:00.000-08:00

Rawr, today was the last day, didnt win, but almost, almost.

VERY tired, so i'm just gonna go sleep, screw blogging for today :X

so yeah, nights! :D

~ShauN~

diediedie

2009-11-05T05:23:00.000-08:00

Eeek, performance of Love Story is tomorrow, :(

Luckily the rest couldnt come, so they can't be dicks again :X

Gonna sleep soon, effing tired, so much running about to do :(

Okay, gonna go sleep, hope we win! Jiayous~

~ShauN~

:D

2009-11-04T05:53:00.000-08:00

oh so happy! recording tomorrow, competition on friday, wish me luck! :D

~ShauN~

woot.

2009-11-03T03:24:00.000-08:00

Okayokay, we're deciding to use Taylor Swift's Love Story for our final song, but we're gonna edit and cut out some parts because of the "rules".

hmm, still possible, but not that dick may not come due to schools bridging, zz, hopefully he can, then we'll stand a chance.

yeah, but it sounds pretty good (:

up to the singer, hopefully she'll pull it off right, couldnt really hear her without the mic today, ahaha, okayokay tomorrow we'll continue, and today did some mixing and recording, Are You Gonna Be My Girl was a failure LOL.

Hmm, kk, gotta go sleep soon, tired as hell, nights! :D

~ShauN~

Fifteen.

2009-11-02T02:37:00.000-08:00

Got introduced to this today, and the title was the same as my age, I shan't elaborate more, here it is! :D

~ShauN~

:D

2009-10-31T05:28:00.000-07:00

YEAHH! MY COM HAS NEW SPECS! :D

-4GB RAM
-NVIDIA GEFORCE GTS 250 (GT9600 EQUIVALENT)
-600GB STORAGE SPACE :D

WEEE I SOUND LIKE A GEEK BUT ITS ALL I KNOW HAHAHA! (Think about playing almost EVERY game on BEST graphics smoothly) :D

:P

Okayokay, I've mild stomach flu so it's not very happy for me, so I'm gonna rest now, buh-bye! :D

~ShauN~

WOO!

2009-10-30T07:56:00.000-07:00

I PASSED EVERYTHING! HAHAHAHAHAHA WOOO! MEANS? NO BRIDGING FOR THE HOLIDAYS! :D

ANDANDAND, I LOVE UNAGI :D

OKAY GONNA SLEEP NIGHTS! :D

~ShauN~

Please understand that i have to leave and carry on my own life.

2009-10-29T09:55:00.001-07:00

And I know that you might take me back inside when the time is right.

RESULTS TOMORROW, BALLS MAN, gives me butterflies in my stomach :P

Nah just kidding, more like food, just had "dinner" and I'm as full as hell. :P

Tomorrow, D-Day, yup, exam results. SHIT.

And there're so many possible IF's after that.

IF - I retain, FML.
IF - I needa go for bridging, FML.
IF - I barely just make it, FML.
IF - I pass with flying colours, HUAT AHHHHHH!

LOL.

Hmm, got the details of the music camp next week, fucking awesome.

Camp rock 2 much? HAHA! Just kidding.

Hmm, gotta lug mah baby there, not just the guitar, my baby and it's "cradle".

Shit.

Hokay, gonna go sleep now. Tired as hell. Nights :D

~ShauN~

You wake up, another year is gone.

2009-10-28T13:36:00.000-07:00

Hey you, happy birthday, though we havent talked much the past few months, just wanted to let you know I didn't forget and best wishes as you finally pass the 15 years mark, and may you have plenty of blessings coming your way, so yeah, HAPPY BIRTHDAY (:

~ShauN~

WOOO

2009-10-21T10:46:00.000-07:00

EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER. SON OF A BITCH YES!

Heard Tokio Hotel's new single Automatic, change in style, yet still VERY well pieced together, goes on my "To-Cover" list, :D

Also discovered their old song, 1000 oceans, forget the stupid title, the song compensates for it, love it. Gonna upload a cover anytime soon, as long as my usb to phone cable actually starts working again -.-

Spent today awhile on the rooftops, breathtaking view, almost fell asleep, heh.
Thought about LOTS of things, so many things, and finally felt good for once. heh.

Ahh, waiting for alvin to get his friend so we can HoN, damn so long.

Hmm, isaac's WoWing now in Barthilas, wonder I should join him or sleep, z.

Sigh. Life's good, holidays now :D anxious for marks O_O

RAWR, dont retain, dont retain, dont retain :D

~ShauN~

i hate this.

2009-10-19T10:14:00.000-07:00

There's no real love in you, why do I keep loving you?

Maths tomorrow, my flexible ruler broke, so I gotta draw free hand.

Everything's turning round again, yep, and landing right back on me.

I'm feeling shittest of shits. If it weren't for the great friends I have I'd be dead.

I can't take this anymore, I'm gonna just die of depression soon.

My head's in a whirl, and I hate this.

Fuck it.

~ShauN~

heavily broken.

2009-10-18T10:36:00.000-07:00

Yup, today went "well".

Woke up and dragged myself outta bed. Sucked.

Went to church, and asked God why this week has been so jaded.
He didnt reply.

So then I asked him why's it that it only happens NOW?
He didnt reply.

Finally, I asked if he was even there.
He told me that what he has been trying to tell me since I felt like this will appear somewhere soon.

So I waited.
And waited.
And waited.

And my internet explorer had this showing me on facebook when I reached home after helping my dad run some errands, and I don't remember leaving facebook on at all, just warcraft3.

It said:
"that a successful relationship requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."

So I read out of curiousity, and this came up:
"Always with the same person, but deeper and deeper ever...y time. Each time on a whole new level you together open in love and discover the truth of your beloved anew. There is no limit to the beauty of your beloved. If you think you've reached the end, stop generalizing."

God's always there, just not in times of our favour, because the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair.

My next question was, "How many times, do I have to keep falling, for the same person?"
Guess what he replied?
Yes, he replied,
But take a guess.
Yup, a pop-up from another site I was looking at said in BRIGHT, BLINKING LIGHTS: congratulations! your our 7th million viewer!"

I sighed to myself, picked up my calculator for some more maths revision, and guess what?
Don't. EVER. call it coincidence, apparently the calculator was malfunctioning, and kept spamming 7 all over. and.

Finally I wondered, why of all numbers, 7?

At last, I found out, that 7, was a complete number in the bible.

I was scared, but eventually smiled to myself, got up my chair, and found my crucifix smiling at me for the first time ;)

~ShauN~

ahhhhh!

2009-10-11T07:32:00.000-07:00

Finally, I get time to blog :D

I feel so damn tired now, basically this how my day went.

I slept at 4, woke up at 815, rushed to church, came home at about 215, studied till 445, went to get my sexy NERF GUN :D then came home and crashed and just woke up.

SS test tomorrow :'(

Pray.Pray.Pray.

oh, to anyone asking about my last post, I'm fine now, and they're fine too so far.

Yeah, I don't really know what else much to say, but thanks to those who were there, directly and indirectly (you know who you are, thanks.)

Yupyup, okay, nothing else to type, and wanna rest more, nights! :D

~ShauN~

Broken.

2009-10-02T10:14:00.000-07:00

In the moonlight
Your face it glows
Like a thousand diamonds
I supposeAnd your hair flows like
The ocean breeze
Not a million fights
Could make me hate you
You’re invincible
Yeah, It’s true
It’s in your eyes
Where I find peace

Is it broken?
Can we work it out?
Let’s light up the town, scream out loud!
Is it broken?
Can we work it out?
I can see in your eyes
You’re ready to break
Don’t look away.

So here we are now
In a place where
The sun blended
With the ocean thin.
So thin, we stand
Across from each other
Together we’ll wonder
If we will last these days
If I asked you to stay
Would you tell me
You would be mine?

And time
Is all I ask for
Time
I just need one more day
And time
You’ve been crying too long
Time
And your tears wrote this song
Stay
In the moonlight
Your face it glows

Is it broken?
Can we work it out?
Let’s light up the town, scream out loud!
Is it broken?
Can we work it out?
I can see in your eyes
You’re ready to break
Don’t look away.

Dear blogger,

Is it that hard to find love nowadays? I'm completely lost and today my world changed, and everything is different now. Why is there all this fighting? Why did it happen? Why did I only find it out 15 years later? Sigh.

Dad - I know how you feel, though your not seeing this, just want to let you know that I know exactly how you feel, you've done wrong, and there's no way to get back up regardless of how much you've done or said, at least I know i'm not alone now. We all have our problems, and though it really shocked me when you guys told me, I want you to know that we'll get through it, and we'll prove that we are indeed sincere and sorry one day. I love you.

Mom - I know what it feels like to get betrayed, and though it was many times, I hope that you two got married because you were meant to be, and not because it was for the moment. I hope you forgive dad, I know you did the moment you knew about it, I'm just sure you just didnt know how to tell him, because I did too. I hope you guys will be okay, and that everything will be back to normal as it was before. Because I believe that you still love dad and dad still loves you. Because all I've been in your situation before, and all you need is time. I love you.

Parents - I'm really sorry for the shit I've done the past 15 years of my life, I'm sorry I had to make you guys pretend to be perfect parents and never thought about myself. It hurts me to see you guys like this, and I'm all up in tears as I'm typing this now, I told you this before in June that I'm really sorry I've taken for granted that you still loved me all these years though I'm not the perfect child, excelling in studies and sports, and yet you still loved me, besides me being physically and academically lousy, you still loved me and gave me 200% of your attention and love the second I was born and never let me out of your sight since, yet giving me all the freedom and liberty I wanted, and when I let myself lend up in all sorts of trouble you still got me out of it, and when I made all sorts of stupid decisions, you were still supportive of it, I'm so sorry, really. I'm sorry for not giving you a son to be proud of, I'm sorry for really everything I've done, and that I never done you proud in anything, all I did was fail and screw things up for you guys. And I'm thankful that you guys made the effort to cover everything up the past 15 years, as I think that it was really impossible to. And as I sit here just sobbing my useless ass away instead of trying to help, I'm sorry for just being me. I hope that eventually you'll make up and stop fighting, and continue being the people that proved to me back then when I was younger that true love really existed. I'll pray that this family gets better again. Love you both.

And now as my world is changed forever, I'll never forget this day. Nor the bitch who made my family this way, and if she ever reads this, she better know that if i happened to see her on the streets, she's fucking finished.

~ShauN~

Lets go.

2009-09-24T09:07:00.000-07:00

Returning to school tomorrow.

I can't feel my legs.
I can't feel my life force.
I can't feel myself.

Why?

Sigh. I miss it when I was able to jump and run around freely, where I had even enough strength to carry my guitar and play all day.

Sigh.

Ah well, gotta catch some sleep before tomorrow, hopefully I won't collaspe in school. Nights.

P.S My garena name shaunewbiez got banned, add me back at ZippyBoi, i got banned while in-game for no reason, think was because I was downloading a custom kick program to test out :P

~ShauN~

AH CHOO

2009-09-22T06:11:00.000-07:00

I'm sick. Really sick.

I've gotta be ready for my EOYs,
I've gotta be up and fighting for any challenge,
I've gotta be in the right mindset to face it.

Okayokay, I'm fine, just needed to let loose a little.

Damned nose is killing me, it's like a clogged pipe. I wanna just turn on this tap of mucus and let everything flow out. Okay that's kinda disgusting. So I'll stop at that.

Sigh, weather's crazy as ever, can't even study in peace, okay, wipe that smile off your face and put your eyeballs back in, i'm actually studying, and can't do it in peace, weather's drawing flu bugs to me like fleas to a dog.

I actually wanted to type something really long and meaningful to me, but I guess I'll have to save it for another day, I won't have the mood to type such a long post. I'm gonna just drop dead soon, but I know I can't. Up and fighting. Up and fighting. Up and fighting.

I wish I could make things a whole lot better.
I wish I could stop time and catch up on everything first.
I wish I could turn back time and stop everything from happening.
I wish I could show you how miserable I am now.
I wish I could just fly away.
I wish.

I'm outta action. I'm outta breath. I'm outta willpower.

someone fill me up again?

Gonna rest, before I really get put out like a flame.

But guess what?

I'm gonna keep on fighting.

~ShauN~

2009-09-21T07:31:00.000-07:00

So many words, so little time.
So much time, so little chances.
So many chances, so little words.

It has been a really enlightening weekend.
I learnt about love.
I learnt about trust.
I learnt about faith.
I learnt about how much those three I was lacking in you and what I had in you were just under MY definitions of the words.

I won't paste a long definition on the word meanings here, but I'd just type what I feel should be here.

However, I learnt that having faith in someone, and trusting someone are two different things.
I also learnt that loving someone does not mean you trust that person nor have faith.
I know too that all three are seperate and equally important.

It's all so complex, yet you can summarize all three when you tell a person "I Love You" and mean it sincerely.

Well, all I know is that I'm trying to understand the meaning of it. I'm trying to find out what it means to love somebody as a whole, with no conditions, no negative thoughts nor will, and how you would give everything and anything up just to be with the person.

I really want to talk more about love, but I feel that I know little on it.

But really, as you know, "A picture paints a thousand words. A song sings a thousand pictures."

Here are my thousand pictures for you.

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cried
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay

I miss you

~ShauN~

who am i?

2009-09-20T09:23:00.000-07:00

Well, been an AWESOME night with Ryan, Wayne, Sameur and Zelig, woot.

Well, tonight proved to me that even love can happen between two people worlds apart, not looks or anything, but through an unexplainable way. Like if you seen just those two people on the street you would never expect them to get married, but tonight proved me wrong.

I searched up on wikipedia on the deifinition of the word "Love", it stated "Love is any of a number of emotions and experiences related to a sense of strong affection and attachment. The word love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure ("I loved that meal") to intense interpersonal attraction ("I love my boyfriend")."

Sigh, that's just a general explanation, i believe in a thing called love, strongly.

I will believe and have faith that love will bring US together, not me to you, nor you to me.
I will believe and have faith that love crosses the boundaries between Impossible and Possible.
I will believe and have faith that love is enough to pull US through any rough times.
I will believe and have faith that love will one day happen regardless of conditions.
I will believe and have faith that love will one day wake US up and realise we were made for each other.

I wish it will happen. I know it may happen. No, wait, I believe it will happen.

I've been thinking on my way back from the place, and saw minutes earlier that others may probably think that one of them is too good for the other, yet they humbled themselves and loved each other unconditionally.

And it seemed as if they went through countless challenges together to test if they were meant to be, and today was proved it did.

Hey, you, as long as you know that one day I'll have the courage to tell you "I Love You" in person and mean it, and that one day I'll have the courage to be able to show you that I'm sincere and able to assure you that I love you as much as you love me, till then, just know that I'm willing to try, and that I can wait forever.

You know who you are.

I'm tired. I'm thinking too much. I miss you.

Nights.

~ShauN~

Rawrr.

2009-09-19T10:58:00.000-07:00

Okay, woke up about 1plus today haha, i realised that i didnt off my lights, com and crap when i slept last night, like, i just slept while i was in the midst of something, LOL.

Okayokay, then went cycling, felt good as the breeze kept blowing in my face :D

Went for 2 games of bowling with dip and darren as i didnt went for VERY long and wanted to see who was better and whether i still had it ;)

ended up with 114 and 123 WITH a houseball, not bad, didnt lose my touch as much as i expected.

they wanna go tomorrow again, this time WITH my own ball, ill see first, heh.

Yup, okay, so now i'm very tired, and i wanna sleep, so gooooodnight! :D

studying with friends at church tomorrow! ciao! :D

UPDATE! Finished learning Heavily Broken, woooahhh hard to sing and play, but i just need to focus ;) i can apply that to life too i guess :D next stop, BAT COUNTREHHH! :D

~ShauN~

2009-09-18T09:25:00.000-07:00

Everyday I sit here waiting
Everyday just seems so long
And now I've had enough of all the hating
Do we even care, it's so unfair
Any day it'll all be over
Everyday there's nothing new
And now I just try to find some hope
To try and hold onto
But it starts again
It'll never end

I'm heavily broken
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do
I'm heavily broken
And there's nothing I can do

Almost giving up on trying
Almost heading for a fall
And now my mind is screaming out
I've gotta keep on fighting
But then again
It doesn't end

I'm heavily broken
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do?
I'm heavily broken
And there's nothing I can do
And there's nothing I can do

Feels like I'm drowning
I'm screaming for air(Screaming for air)
Louder I'm crying
And you don't even care

I'm heavily broken
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move(What can I do)
When there's nothing left to say
What can you doI'm heavily broken

I'm heavily broken
And I don't know what to do
Can't you see that I'm choking
And I can't even move
When there's nothing left to say
What can you do
I'm heavily broken
I'm heavily broken
I'm heavily broken

AMAZING song, it's going into my list of songs to learn :D

~ShauN~

!

2009-09-18T08:37:00.001-07:00

300th post! haha! didnt realise my blog has been around that long :O

Surprisingly it's still active! HAHA!

Yupyup, today after school went lan after SO long, feels weird to be touching a different com than mine, haha!

Okay, day started out with some boredom, but had fun after recess :D found out i gotten A2 for chem term 3 but sadly gotten C5 for english term 3 :/ almost B4, but still bad :/

Laughed ALOT today, over all the retarded crap that happens in school, sigh, without those people, it's as good as hell.

After school went lan like i said, won two out of two games and felt GOOOOD :D

Then went home, tired as shit. Still not gonna sleep though :D

Then now waiting for everyone to get ready to play, really bored, so studying, yes, studying, dont bother rubbing your eyes, and wipe that smile off your face, yes, i am studying for physics now, gah, stupid fomulas.

At least it's a 3 day weekend, can chill my ass off :D

Update! Learning When You're Gone melody now, and learnt abit more on Bat Country's duel Synyster's side as i found it more challenging and wont make much of a difference if paid alone :P

Hmm, okayokay, gonna go wash my plates, still here LOL :P

Ciao! :D

~ShauN~

Zzz.

2009-09-17T12:05:00.001-07:00

It's late, I'm tired, I'm gonna sleep after my 7hour nap, nights! :D

~ShauN~

I miss you.

2009-09-16T13:19:00.001-07:00

This is amazing, I could actually feel the soul in this, and it made me cry :')

Drop all other things, I'm learning this next. I swear :)
I miss you, this song was the first thing that came to my mind, I hope you feel the same.
~ShauN~

...

2009-09-16T10:43:00.000-07:00

Come with me tonight we can make the night last 4ever.

HAHA, okay, today was okay, the chemistry project thing was well, fail -.-

Yup, thanks to those two that didnt do shit for 2 weeks, dunno how to explain, then the whole group got affected. Bullcrap.

Tomorrow there's PE, shit. Tired as hell man.

Omfg, physics 4 days in a damn row is no joke, i think i deserve a medal for staying awake or something HAHA.

Afterlife update! I'm stopping the learning for awhile, i'm learning Bat Country's harmony at the moment, the duet part as i may wanna do that part with a friend.

And learning 4Ever by The Veronicas, Mr. Brightside by The Killers and Second Chance by Shinedown too. Haha.

Speaking of The Veronicas, got a few responses for my video, both positive and negative, but thanks so much for the positive comments guys, be it telling me personally or messaging me! :D
ANDANDAND an AMAZING DISCOVERY - Jessica Origliasso and Lisa Origliasso of The Veronicas remind me of Cassadee Pope HAHAHA! Don't flame me, i call it as i see it ;)

Okayokay, shit, gotta pack my bag, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

Hella yeah!

2009-09-15T06:30:00.001-07:00

Woooo! Just spent about 45minutes learning, playing and recording a low quality video of Untouched, finally it's up and my fingers HURT.

I think it really sucks ass, so don't blame me for shabbiness, a 45minute project, nothing much more you can expect.

Threw in a very small blues scale for the first verse, sorta "fitted" the song, so yup.

Today was TIRING, oral was funny crap, trying to hold back my laughter as i did a fake accent, and HAHAHA, i left laughing till i ran outta air :P

Speaking of air, there's haze, and it is REALLY clogging up my breathing, lucky there's aircon :D

Tomorrow have to stay back again i think, stupid work :(

Gawd, finally handed up my history work, and first time i heard Mr David Wong shout at eng han man, damn scary shit.

Haha, got an email from (aint gonna say who due to copyright restrictions) about her friend Taylor Swift getting dissed by Kanye West at the VMA's, man, that guy aint got no dignity, i mean, what was she supposed to say man? she was in a very tight position, damn, he should really learn to think before he speak, dumb ass. Anyway, congrats Taylor! Hope to meet up with you in the future or something and dont listen to kanye, your the best :)

Okayokay, gonna go pack up and go sleep, didnt catch enough rest today, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

zz

2009-09-14T12:33:00.001-07:00

This story's getting old, the homewrecker with the heart of gold.

RAWR, i just woke up after a nap since 6 LOL, damn i'm missing out on alot of stuff at night, sigh, everyone went to bed already :(

Okayokay, today was good, went school, WOO, B3 for chemistry :D aint gonna fail no more :D

For SS, doing okay, wanna see the rest of my marks too :/

Um, nothing else yeah, tomorrow have oral, stupid Facebook app says i'm gonna fail :(

Gonna prove it wrong :D

Afterlife update! Okay, getting the solo down is pretty hard, by the time i reach half of the solo, my fingers get cramps and numb, gonna try another alternative method.

Oh yeah, I'm gonna attempt covering Untouched by the Veronicas by ear due to some people requesting and asking me, and sounds like fun, has potential to incorperate a some scales into them which i'm still learning, haha! okayokay, gonna sleep, 2 hours to school :P

~ShauN~

Meek Meek!

2009-09-13T09:43:00.000-07:00

School starts in about 7hours, crap.

Still have lots of holiday homework i havent done yet, gonna get screwed tomorrow, LOL.

Dnt, history, maths, damn, G_G

Haha, okayokay, so today was spent waking up super early for church, then went to church, was the first though i woke up late :D

Yeah, after that went for lunch but i didnt eat anything LOL. i didnt eat lunch today, sad.

Hmm, after that came home, cut hair, slept my day away, but still tired, then tomorrow gonna go back to school sleepy :P

Ahh, okayokay, gonna sleep now, really tired, eyelids drooping, nights! :D

~ShauN~

2009-09-12T11:54:00.000-07:00

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love, purpose hard to find
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah

There's nothing here for me on this barren road
There's no one here while the city sleeps
And all the shops are closed
Can't help but think of the times
I've had with you
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah

Dear God, the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold her when I'm not around, when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her and now I wish I'd stayed
Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired, I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away
I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways
And how I miss someone to hold
When hope begins to fade

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love, purpose hard to find

Really, that's all I ask of you, God.

Yup, so today i woke up nicely at 3, which was what time i was supposed to meet roxanne and darren downstairs, SHIT LOL. so called them up, appraently no one was ready yet, so phew, i'm safe :D

Yup, okay, erm, added Seize The Day to our songlist with Ken, yeah, haha. Random me :P Just love the solo.

Omfg, i think i'm turning into an Avenged Sevenfold hardcore freak, but ah well, the music is Godly, what can i say? :D

Okayokay, so went to peninsula, yeah, bought a bag, a few badges, and an Avenged Sevenfold shirt, haha, yeah, took off the bags chain, and used my WoW undead insignia badge to cover the logo, to "un-bengify" the bag LOL. So my bag now has um, lets see, an Avenged Sevenfold badge, a Blink-182 badge, a badge that says BITCH!, a Levis:501 Unbuttoned badge i got from singfest, my CS:Condition Zero badge, and my WoW undead insignia badge, so basically, the top part of my bag has badges for music and style, while the bottom has badges for games :D

Mmm, shit, church tomorrow at 8, its in 5hours, LOL. and it's the last day of holidays tomorrow :'(

Gonna rush for the EOYs, i'm gonna make it through.

Omfg, i just realised i at 2 cups of noodles in the same hour LOL, buffet night again :D

Afterlife update! Learnt a lil' more, conditioning my fingers for the VERY fast sweeps, like, to put them in position before i sweep, ahh, complicated crap.

Okayokay, VERY tired, hopefully i can wake up tomorrow, NIGHTS! :D

~ShauN~

Seize the day.

2009-09-11T10:16:00.000-07:00

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry
These's streets we traveled on will undergo our same lost past
I found you here, now please just stay for a while
I can move on with you around
I hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?
I'll do anything for a smile, holding you 'til our time is done
We both know the day will come, but I don't want to leave you

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry(a melody, a memory, or just one picture)
Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Newborn life replacing all of us, changing this fable we live in
No longer needed here so where do we go?
Will you take a journey tonight, follow me past the walls of death?
But girl, what if there is no eternal life?

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry(a melody, a memory, or just one PICTURE)
Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Trials in life, questions of us existing here
Don't wanna die alone without you here
Please tell me what we have is real

So what if I never hold you, yeah, or kiss your lips again?
Whooooah
So I never want to leave you and the memories of us to see
I beg don't leave me

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over
Trials in life, questions of us existing here
Don't wanna die alone without you here
Please tell me what we have is real

Silence, you lost me-- no chance for one more day
I stand here alone falling away from you, no chance to get back home
Silence, you lost me-- no chance for one more day
I stand here alone falling away from you, no chance to get back home
Silence, you lost me-- no chance for one more day
I stand here alone falling away from you, no chance to get back home
Silence, you lost me-- no chance for one more day

Ahh, okay, blogging today, today was kinda slow and relaxing, but omfg, its the last weekday of the holidays, son of a bitch! :O

Have yet to do alot of holiday work, most of it anyways haha!

Went for awesome pizza hut with doug, dip and josh at siglap, took 15 minutes to decide what to eat, wtf.

Just WoW-ed while was talking about our childhood with xanne, HAHA, she's just.. crazy i swear :D

Yeah, didnt go to penin with her as her damn phone died during the day, so it's postponed to tomorrow, and darrens going, so hopefully can leech off some food from him :D

Plan to get a plain black backpack, yeah those "beng" ones, but there's gonna be a twist to it, gonna take out the retarded chain in front, and add on patches and badges all over the front, cool eh? yeah, band badges, brands, any crap i can see, it goes on there :D

Gonna stock up on some bandshirts too, part of my dressing style now, you know, emo/gothic stuff, okay i know that leans towards more of the metal scene dressing, but ah well, black is good, thats the key :D

Afterlife update! Learnt abit more, but lacking the finger speed, supposed to do a bit of a lick, then alternate picking, yeah, so the concept of swapping between both techniques are just crazy, but gonna try :D

Uh-huh, okayokay, really late, meeting up with them for lunch tomorrow, so gotta sleep early, i woke up at 3 today, wtf!? :O

P.S If your reading this, me too.

Okay! gotta go! nights! :D

~ShauN~

2009-09-10T11:50:00.000-07:00

Like walking into a dream, so unlike what you've seen.
So unsure but it seems, 'cause we've been waiting for you.
Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste.
Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway.

I see a distant light, but girl this can't be right.
Such a surreal place to see so how did this come to be,
Arrived too early.
And when I think of all the places
I just don't belong,
I've come to grips with life and realize this is going too far.

I don't belong here, we gotta move on dear, escape from this afterlife.
'Cause this time I'm right to move on and on, far away from here.

A place of hope and no pain, perfect skies with no rain.
Can leave this place but refrain, 'cause we've been waiting for you.
Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste.
Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway.

This peace on earth's not right (with my back against the wall).
No pain or sign of time (I'm much too young to fall).
So out of place don't wanna stay, I feel wrong and that's my sign.
I've made up my mind.
Give me your hand but realize I just wanna say goodbye.
Please understand I have to leave and carry on my own life.

I don't belong here, I gotta move on dear escape from this afterlife.
'Cause this time I'm right to move on and on, far away from here.
Got nothing against you and surely I'll miss you.
This place full of peace and light, and I'd hoped you might,
Take me back inside, when the time is right.

I don't belong here, I gotta move on dear,
This place full of peace and light, and I'd hoped you might,

Take me back inside when the time is right.

02:49 for the solo, fastest shit ever.

~ShauN~

ehhh!

2009-09-10T11:20:00.000-07:00

Okay, think today i'm gonna post something quite long, haha, nah, it aint no inspiration story, just feel like posting a longlong post as my blog needs some kind of.. content to it :D

hmm, so today, started out my day really early about 8, went to school for extra lessons, damn, i didnt know i was supposed to be there an hour earlier for physics, but ah well, at least 80% of the class didnt turn up as it was too early. we just went there, did some revision, worksheets, got alot of help. then by the time i finished, too late for maths remedial, almost halfway through maths, LOL.

okay, then came home, dip came for awhile, chilled, hmm, he played worms armageddon, and he doesnt know what the hell wind direction is, right dip? i suppose blasting 2 of your men into the water with a bazooka is VERY strategic ;)

he left after awhile, then i just crashed on my bed, and i swear, best nap i ever had. haha. i dreamt about.. retarded stuff.

woke up to a ringing phone, and thank God you called, you were the last person i'd expect to call, yet you made such a giant impact on me. and true enough, it really worked, thanks so much, if you ever need me, i'll be there for you too :D

hmm, recieved some kind of information that i've some type of split personality disorder, where i'm more than one person at times, even up to three of four, well, i have to say it is fun, when one side of me is tired, another takes over, and surprising results always happen, wonder if there's some way to learn how to take control of it, switching whenever i feel like.

okayokay, apart from that, oh yeah! many people were asking me on updates on me learning Afterlife by Avenged Sevenfold, man, i gotta say, it's really taking its toll on me, but i love it! though i only can play less than a quarter of the solo now, but wooo, i can feel the adrenaline pumping as i'm typing this, haha! just wondering how i'm gonna do the dive bomb squealie thing without a floyd rose tremolo :/

okayokay, problems aside, just went raiding with josh, doug and dip in WoW, and w-t-f, we just got fired off by some random person online because she thinks we were dissing her religion LOL, all i did was double typed on accident with my cold, numb hands "F Fasting" instead of "Fasting". Sensitive, i swear. And while i was eating my delicious clam chowder, those dickheads cracked some joke so bad yet good, i actually sneezed the soup out of my nose LOL. HAHA, chuckling to myself now, bah, really bad personality disorder.

Meh, holidays are ending soon, but woot, enjoying every minute of it, meeting up with roxanne, natalie, darren and maybe arravinnd tomorrow, gonna go peninsula, need some band merch and stuff, and go window shopping at godly guitars which i only can dream to have :(

gonna upload Afterlife's music video in awhile, don't worry, it's not screamo or whatever, it actually has a decent melody to it :P

Hmm, don't think that there's anything else i need to type about, but today has been a very interesting day.

Okay, gotta sleep now folks! gimming with doug and dip tomorrow, no, it's really spelt that way, you know? Gym and Swim? Gim? LOL. okayokay, i'm sleepy, so i'm cracking the dryest of jokes, nights! :D

~ShauN~

zzz.

2009-09-09T09:38:00.000-07:00

SHIT, school from 9-12 tomorrow, wtf.

Ahh, hopefully can wake up in time to get some breakfast, i'm starved. Damn.

Mmm. I can taste Macs hot cakes in my mouth :X

WoW was okay, level 18 and about 65% now, first instance, with dip screwing up as he always does in ANY online game. LOL.

Yup, gonna grind abit more, then rush to bed. Before i wake up one day finding myself returning from school LOL.

No homework, heng. Nights! :D

P.S I don't fucking care if your big or shit. To me, your just another attention seeking dickface who doesn't understand the meaning of "get a life." and if youhave the balls as you claim, you come straight to my face and say, don't talk behind my back, kid.

~ShauN~

Did you really think I'd let you kill this chorus?

2009-09-08T11:36:00.000-07:00

Is it still me that makes you sweat?
Am I who you think about in bed?
When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress?
Then think of what you did
And how I hope to God he was worth it.
When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as your fingers touch his skin.
I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no, you know it will always just be me

So I guess we're back to us, oh cameraman, swing the focus
In case I lost my train of thought, where was it that we last left off?
(Let's pick up, pick up)
Oh now I do recall, we were just getting to the part
Where the shock sets in, and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you get sick.
I hope you didn't expect that you'd get all of the attention.
Now let's not get selfish
Did you really think I'd really let you kill this chorus?

Dance to this beat
Dance to this beat
Dance to this beat

Let's get these teen hearts beating.
Faster, faster
Let's get these teen hearts beating.
Faster

I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no, you know it will always just be me

Let's get these teen hearts beating.
Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls,
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Dance to this beat

So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Dance to this beat

And hold a lover close
Let's get these teen hearts beating.
Faster, faster
Let's get these teen hearts beating.
Faster

Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking off her clothes - Panic! At The Disco

One of the biggest influence on my current song i'm writing now, not bad. Heh. Thanks for sharing with me this song! HAHA, love it :D

P.S Just found out that harlequin means girls who give sex free to boys.

okayokay, gotta sleep, waking up in 3 hours to play WoW with the rest. Ciao! :D

~ShauN~

Phew.

2009-09-08T08:01:00.000-07:00

She's fine. Thank God :)

~ShauN~

Shit.

2009-09-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

Crap, grandmother's on her way to the hospital, something to do with her abdomen,
(Laugh, mother fuckers, laugh, I believe in karma in this world, when this situation happens to you, I'll fucking piss on their graves.)

She'll be fine. I'll pray, and pray, and pray.

Today wasn't a very productive day either, all I did was WoW, good thing for the weekly WoW maintenance to get me back to sleep for awhile, now waiting for everyone to get online to DotA.

Ah, gonna rest awhile longer, Ciao.

'Cause if you fall, stumble down, I'll pick you up off the ground, if you lose, faith in you, I'll give you strength to pull through, tell me you won't give up, and I'll be waiting if you fall, you know that I'll be there for you.

~ShauN~

hungreee :(

2009-09-07T09:38:00.000-07:00

damn, i'm starving :(

WoW is taking my life away! HAHA!

Imma lazy slob :D

okayokay, gotta go, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

meow-r

2009-09-06T09:59:00.000-07:00

If everyone shared, swallowed their pride, we'd see the day, where nobody died.

Okay! Today spent most of my day WoW-ing, 13hours so far, level 13, yes, it's THAT hard to level up with breaks in between HAHA.

hmm, now Doug wanna change server due to us Singaporeans playing with US people and time zones being screwed up.

ah screw him, haha, gonna sleep now, thursday's gonna be a long day for me, 3 subject remedials, and chinese listening.

heh, okayokay, gotta go! nights! :)

~ShauN~

edyd ftfw.

2009-09-05T10:17:00.001-07:00

This really was a message from God, since I just came back from EDYD '09 - Hope in God.

Okay, today, was, awesome, whole day was in EDYD, i snoozed til 1120, rushed my ass to parkway macs to meet the rest, and finally went to church till 'bout 4 then moved to KCP for EDYD 2009! :D

tired as hell, but awesome day, kept me going throughout :D love ya guys! :)

now i'm back, and i wanna continue my sleep, heh. feel sooo tired :(

Saw lotsa people! haha, really crowded.

meh, WoW starts tomorrow, time to do this. Ahh, okayokay, gonna sleep soon. nights! :D

~ShauN~

Yes, I do.

2009-09-04T09:26:00.000-07:00

Bright cold silver moon
Tonight alone in my room
You were here just yesterday

Slight turn of the head
Eyes down when you said
I guess I need my life to change
Seems like something's just aren't the same
What could I say?

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time that I try I get tongue tied
I'll need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I stare up at the stars
I wonder just where you are
You feel a million miles away (I wonder just where you are)
Was it something I said?
Or something I never did?
Or was I always in the way?
Could someone tell me what to say to just make you stay?

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I know it feels like the end
Don't want to be here again
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
What it takes I don't care
We're gonna make it I swear
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
Again

I need a little more luck than a little bit
Cuz every time I get stuck the words won't fit
But every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by

I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
Cuz every time that I try I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

I know it feels like the end
Don't want to be here again
And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again
What it takes I don't care
We're gonna make it I swear

And we could help each other off the ground so we never fall down again

Okay, went FUNAN with josh, doug and dip to go "WoW shopping", took home two awesome sets of badges with the insignia's of the different races on them :D

bought a 60-day card, gonna activate it tomorrow night or something, after the youth rally thing.

shit man, blew a big hole in my wallet :/

gonna "lose" my life to WoW, haha, there goes my holidays! :P

now beginning to regret though, it's all just virtual achievement, but i wanna look back when i'm older and at least said i had a good childhood :D

ahh, gonna sleep now, meeting most of the rest at 11 tomorrow for lunch, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

..

2009-09-03T12:17:00.001-07:00

School starts in 2 and a half hours,

i'm gonna need ALOT of energy as i'd probably be camping during the 1-week holiday to play World Of Warcraft with the guys,

i'm sick,

and i've no MC to cover tomorrow.

Fuck.

~ShauN~

WHEEE!

2009-09-02T09:08:00.000-07:00

Suburban living with a feeling that I'm giving up everything for you

today was okay. nah, who am i kidding.

sucks.

super tired, super boring lesson, i'm falling sick. shit.

hmm. maybe i wont go to school tomorrow, headache and flu now :(

*sneezes*

josh, doug and dip wanna start playing retail wow, maybe. just maybe gonna join them.

yeah. but end year holiday more likely. heh. :D

okayokay, gotta go, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

:)

2009-09-01T07:55:00.000-07:00

I just realised what it means when people say "time is precious, you can't turn it back"

It's okay, smile! :D

yeah, today woke up, cycled and rushed to siglap, had awesome prata for breakfast :D

yeah, came back, played 2 games, one owned, other got owned. sad :/

yeah, back to school tomorrow. screw school.

there's really nothing much to type nowadays, boring. heh :D

okayokay, gonna play some guitar, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

ummm

2009-08-31T11:26:00.000-07:00

Escape from this afterlife.

Today didnt go for celebration, had a nice sleep-in ;)

So lazy. Imma pig.

Uh, yeah, nothing much left to say, gonna sleep. Nights! :)

~ShauN~

My mood in a song.

2009-08-30T11:23:00.000-07:00

My mood expressed in a song.

Staring out into the world
across the street
You hate the way your
life turned out to be
He's pulling up in the
driveway and you don't
make a sound
'Cause you always learn to
hold the things you want to say
Your always going to be afraid

There's only hate
There's only tears
There's only pain
There is no love here
Oh so what will you do?
There's only lies
There's only fears
There's only pain
There is no love here

Broken down like a mirror
smash to pieces
You learned the hardway to shut your mouth
and smile
If these walls could talk
they would have so much to say
Cause everytime you fight
the scars are gonna heal
but there never gonna go away

There's only hate
There's only tears
There's only pain
There is no love here
Oh so what will you do?
There's only lies
There's only fears
There's only pain
There is no love here
Oh no So what will you do?
You're falling, you're screaming
you're stuck in the same old nightmare

He's lying, you're crying
there's nothing left to salvage
Kick the door 'cause this is over
Get me out of here(Kick the door)

There's only hate
There's only tears
There's only pain
There is no love here
Oh so what will you do?
There's only lies
There's only fears
There's only pain
There is no love here
Tell me what will you do?

There's only hate
There's only tears
There's only pain

There is no love here.

~ShauN~

2009-08-30T11:16:00.000-07:00

I just don't want to waste another day
I'm trying to make things right
But you shove it in my face
And all those things you've
done to me I can't erase
And I can't keep this inside
It's time to say goodbye

On the first day that I met you
I should have known to walk away
I should have told you you were crazy
And disappear without a trace
But instead I stood there waiting
Hoping you would come around
But you always found a way to let me down

It's time to say goodbye
(I just don't want to waste another day)
It's time to say goodbye
(Cause things will never be the same)
It's time to say goodbye
(You make me think I need to walk away)
It's time to say goodbyeIt's time to say goodbye

After all the things I've done for you
You never tried to do the same
It's like you always play the victim
And I'm the one you always blame
When you need someone to save you
When you think you're going to drown
(Think you're going to drown)
You just grab your arms around
me and pull me down

It's time to say goodbye
(I just don't want to waste another day)
It's time to say goodbye
(Cause things will never be he same)
It's time to say goodbye
(You make me think I need to walk away)
It's time to say goodbye
It's time to say goodbye

Now I'm gone
It's too late
You can't fix
Your mistakes
I was trying to save you from you
So you scream
So you cry
I can see
Through your lies
You're just trying to change me
(Trying to change me)

Somewhere in the distance
There's a place for me to go
I don't want you to hate me
But I think you need to know
You're weighing on my shoulders
And I'm sick of feeling down
So I guess it's time for me to say goodbye

~ShauN~

woot.

2009-08-30T10:46:00.000-07:00

awesome, just learnt Your Love Is Just A Lie by Simple Plan. haha!

Yeah, today went church, ahh, EDYD next week, and I have CIP which was offered for x2 hours if I heard correctly. Shit.

Gah, sick, tomorrow may not go for movie :/

4 days weekend, awesome :D

yeah, okay, i'm gonna sleep soon, eyes falling.

You know I'll be there for you, nothing is gonna change the fact that you can do it.

~ShauN~

:P

2009-08-29T09:31:00.000-07:00

AH-WOOOOOO! today was AWESOME!

i had NO idea how i blacked out :(

the last thing i remembered, was that i put down my headset, walked to my mirror and i opened my eyes to see a clock telling 2pm to me. and i screamed WTF.

so rushed down to douby, reached 3, watched BANDSLAM! goddamn awesome movie.

though it was kinda obvious most of the songs were lipsync, their finger positioning was all nutty.

ah well, great movie anyway. vanessa hudgens was so different compared to HSM in this movie. haha!

after that, went to ariel's house, it.was.BIG!

swam, then came home.

gonna game now, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

ROCK ON.

2009-08-28T09:16:00.000-07:00

WOOO! BAYBEATS 2009 DAY 1, WAS A COMPLETE OVERHAUL AWESOME EXPERIENCE :D

okayokay, so today ended school, went home, guitar hero-ed with darren, doug and dip.

about 6, went eat then esplanade, BAYBEATTTTS!

arrived too late for West Grand Boulevard :'(

left too early for The Great Spy Experiment :(

Shit. ah well, found out 2 bands were surprisingly good, though one of them had songs which were mostly in malay. still carried a good tune. thumbs up!

and the best part, is that i MAY, highlight MAY get the opportunity to perform next year! :D

not really sure though, i need at least several originals songs.

may go back on sunday, Anberlin's coming, tomorrow has nothing much, except for In Each Hand A Cutlass, though i barely listen to them. hmm.

gonna dota now, ciao! :D

Because sooner or later, your gonna find out that this world has made you a lie deep down of regret without thinking twice.

~ShauN~

2009-08-27T08:08:00.000-07:00

Show me, show me, show me a starry-eyed kid
I, I, I will break his jaw
I won't, I won't, I won't let him get his hopes up
No-oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

And I will save him from himself
Here's a picture with a note
"No, don't turn out like me"
It's only for your own good
No-oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

And haven't you heard
The word on the street is"I lost it, called it quits"
Get out into the sun,
Out from behind the gossip
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

This story's getting old
The home wrecker with the heart of gold
Keep you locked up in the trunk of my mind
Keep, k-keep talking
Keep this alive

This story's getting old
The home wrecker with the heart of gold
Keep you locked up in the trunk of my mind now-ow, ow-ow, ow-ow

Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Hey, hey

Even when there's
N-n-n-n-nothing worth living for
You're still, you're still, still worth lying for
N-no one has to know-ow, ow-ow, ow-ow

And haven't you heard
The word on the street is
"I lost it, called it quits"
Get out into the sun
Out from behind the gossip
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

This story's getting old
The home wrecker with the heart of gold
Keep you locked up in the trunk of my mind
Keep, k-keep talking
Keep this alive
This story's getting old (This story's getting old)
The home wrecker with the heart of gold
Keep you locked up in the trunk of my mind now-ow, ow-ow, ow-ow

Okay, so today went fine, got hit in the stomach thanks to a very well done feint. Anyway, tomorrow is friday! :D

Baybeats tomorrow! :) had a free pass from M, but not sure if the band is going, if they're backstage, then I'll consider :X

Yeah, erm, nothing much really happened at home. Slept awhile. Oh yeah, Transfomers:Revenge of the Fallen on com is REALLY laggy, the FPS is cmi. And my com was supposed to be "better than average", so either the game is like L4D and expects ALOT of specs, or my com needs to change parts.

Considered on getting a Razer keyboard and mouse combo, at some pretty decent prices, sadly their "decent" isn't decent enough for me :(

Ah, but I know I'm not gonna get a diamondback, used them before, its overrated, and don't get me wrong, it's good, it's just not worth it for it's price. :/

Woops, here comes dip and doug calling me on skype, that means a games coming up. Ciao! :D

Because it's hard to say "I Do", when I don't.

~ShauN~

:/

2009-08-26T10:47:00.001-07:00

I'll hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?

Indeed, too many people to ache over.

I'm sick of this. Seriously.

Almost got caught for my hair "colour", it's just black dye fading away. At least I dyed it back. Lucky me.

Learnt Someday by Nickelback this afternoon, and I have a resolution to learn Afterlife by Avenged Sevenfold and it's super solo which requires a 6-pack of Red Bull to play, and I swear, 32notes in 2 seconds is no joke, my fingers will have a seizure after everything :P

Hmm, planning on getting my Strat's whammy bar tightened, the guitar keeps going off tuning everytime I do a full bend, annoying.

Crap, gonna sleep now, lots of work due this week, nights! :D

~ShauN~

shit.

2009-08-25T07:29:00.000-07:00

I just realised I have ALOT of work to catch up on. ah well.

anyway, today went okay, felt so tired though.

i finally did that spinning thing with my guitar today, almost crashed my mirror, lucky shit. but felt great.

i'm slowly gonna finish my dnt, slowwwwly.

NEW PHRASE OF THE WEEK: "Don't be a dip to humans, don't be human to dip." HAHA all the way.

'Cause when it all comes back to you, your left with what I needed.

Gotta go, ciao :D

~ShauN~

._.

2009-08-24T09:17:00.001-07:00

it sucks, waking up after what it feels like a 15 minute nap, to find out it's been 3 hours. :/

omg, i'm super tired, i slept for at least 6hours, and it's like i never slept at all. wth :(

RAWR, so much work left to do, ahh, no choice, do tomorrow. really tired. i can barely open my eyes.

anyway, another song is in the progress of being written, just gonna release the name as "There's a difference to words of wanting to get laid and love, kid."

who knows, might release some parts of the song somewhere along the next few days, who knows..

andandand, been looking around for a very cheap or 2nd hand drumset, electronic or real one doesnt really matter, need something to crashhitbang :D

yeah, thinking about getting a proper recording kit though, home recordings are awesome, they're all yours, and cheaper in the long run, ahh, moneymoneymoney, come to me :P

ahh, lazy, gonna sleep now, nights! :D

~ShauN~

ah well.

2009-08-23T07:40:00.000-07:00

I'm doubtful, no doubt.

Spent most of the day out, had no inspiration for my 30 sketches. screw.

Just came back from a "Late night macs rush" with dip. Retarded combination of a skateboard and bicycle for transport. heh.

yeah. felt so tired the whole day. just let me sleep and not wake up forever.

nothing else, goodnight.

~ShauN~

Woot.

2009-08-22T08:36:00.000-07:00

Okay, attempting to upload my just-taken videos of Fall Out Boy's Don't You Know Who I Think I Am? and Avenged Sevenfold's Seize The Day Solo cover on facebook. REALLY shitty. :/

Um, woke up quite late today, did abit of DnT sketching, i'm left with 18 more sketches to go :/

Went for moms bday dinner, hell lotta food, almost exploded, all-you-can-eat at an ALL ASIAN FOOD buffet, the chefs were probably wondering why i was stuck at the japanese section the whole time ;)

Yeah, lazy me, church tomorrow, sigh.

Nights.

~ShauN~

I've got a secret.

2009-08-21T10:06:00.000-07:00

I know something you don't know.

This is stupid, they're gonna split both NA classes into "Academic" and "Discipline" classes, where the Academic get the good teachers while the rest get the shitty ones. Might as well not come to school eh?

Principal is just shooting himself in the foot. He does this process, the percentage of people wanting to leave and/or change school will rise dramatically. And he loses the only thing he lives for - money.

Anyway, TGIF! :D just woke up, eating my "dinner" now, damn I'm full.

School went fine, had badminton for PE, lost to chester and daiyalan in doubles (obviously) -.-

I finally can sleep again :D

Okay, gonna wash the dishes, then dota with jeremy. Ciao :D

~ShauN~

zz

2009-08-20T06:27:00.001-07:00

EVERYONE IS SLOW IN REACTION TODAY.

annoying pricks.

okay i slept through school today, had a fever in the morning, got better with panadol :D

stayed home, did abit of DnT, 30 sketches aint no joke. ALOT to do.

then today is dougs actual bday, haha.

and my hair is growing long! shhh, pray i dont get caught soon :D

sigh, TGIF tomorrow! can actually sleep again in class and chapel.

yeah, gonna go back to my game now, cya! :D

~ShauN~

..

2009-08-19T06:54:00.000-07:00

I've got a secret, it's at the tip of my tongue, it's at the back of my lungs.

Today went okay, school was quite fast surprisingly, and I see chinese tomorrow and I'm grinning now :D

sadly, 30 sketches by friday.. stupid DnT.

hmm, yeah, apart from that, I am SUPER tired, I woke up almost dead to the floor.

Okay, um, yeah. Nothing to type about.

OH YEAH, learnt Learning To Fall by Boys Like Girls acoustic version. Yep, that's right, NO power chords :D all chords :D

yepyep, gonna sleep soon, oh yeah..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DOUG! :D

think this is the first time after those 15 years of knowing you that I actually wished you on the day itself and gave you a present, through luring you out of your house and letting dip rush upstairs to put the present on your table, ENJOY THE LAVA LAMP :D

haha. yepyep, gonna go off blogger now, cya! :D

~ShauN~

wtf?

2009-08-18T12:15:00.001-07:00

omg, i woke up at 3am and i have no idea how i fell asleep -.-

all i remember was entering my room after my bath, lay on my bed, and when i opened my eyes, its 3am.

i've a sore throat now and i cant talk, my limbs are numb, and i cant really see much, i'm fading away slowly :/

anyway, today's dougs birthday, so happy bday in advance :D 15years of knowing you :P

sigh, gonna continue my sleep, super tired. nights!

~ShauN~

z

2009-08-17T09:18:00.000-07:00

just ended a retarded game, dip cant play for shit.

okay, today was fine, i just kept sleeping, cant stand the fucking school, especially dogs like that fuckface, stupid kid, no balls fight with people older need to feed off smaller people? joke, go kiss your moms ass.

now i'm thinking what to do, i just had "dinner", and i dont wanna dota anymore. hmm.. which reminds me that a physics test is coming up tomorrow, shit. and there's history and SS on thursday. shit. how am i gonna write 2 papers designed for writing long essays on the same day? my hand's gonna be crooked :/

bah, gonna get something to drink, thirsty as hell. cya.

~ShauN~

2009-08-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

I'm coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?

It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head

But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, letting me go
And I just can’t look - it's killing me
And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Turning through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside

I’m coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head

But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, letting me go
'Cause I just can’t look - it's killing me
And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Turning through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside

I never...
I never...
I never...
I never...

OKAY! so had GH with the guys today, gonna make this post short. rocked out, scream aim fire video going on facebook soon as the video's with jon -.-!

yeah, gonna eat my noodles now, cya! :D

~ShauN~

this com is screwed.

2009-08-15T08:36:00.000-07:00

My com is screwed. it keeps freezing. wth.

sigh, sunday tomorrow. that means it's the last day of my weekend, oh joy. -.-!

blogblogblog. haha, just died in dota, waiting for respawn. um..

no idea if i should wear eyeliner tomorrow. part of the whole "emo" shit. hmm, see first.

most probably not.

yeah, tomorrow afternoon, GH frenzy with darren and jon, :D

meh, so tired. havent been getting much sleep these past few days :(

sigh.. yeah, respawned now, CYA! :D

~ShauN~

nice.

2009-08-14T09:39:00.001-07:00

woah, just borrowed guitar hero world tour and the guitar from darren, gonna be playing all night long :D haha.

yeah, today went fine, woke up quite late, dip came most of the day, dota sucked balls :/

yeah, get well soon P! :) bring that fever down asap :D

yeah, gonna get back to GH:WT, WOOOOO! :D

~ShauN~

.!

2009-08-13T10:11:00.000-07:00

i just finished 2weeks of dnt today :D

i feel refreshed and great :D

sadly had to take MC today cuz of my high fever last night, crap.

oh my, its late, but i got another day for tomorrow, guess i'll just go to school to hand up my dnt project then leave :D maybe i should stay on, its weird, whenever i wanna stay home, i dont have mc, but whenever i have mc, i wanna go school :(

erm, nothing much else to blog about, life is very stale for me right now, nothing interesting is happening :/

ahh, gonna watch videos now, cya! :)

Planned a set list on what songs to learn, here it is:
(x)Emergency - Paramore
(x)Six Feet Under The Stars - All Time Low
()On Top Of The World - Boys Like Girls
()Thunder - Boys Like Girls
(x)Love Drunk - Boys Like Girls
()I'd Come For You - Nickelback
()Someday - Nickelback
()Scream - Tokio Hotel
()Final Day - Tokio Hotel
()Monsoon - Tokio Hotel
()Ready, Set, Go! - Tokio Hotel
()Only One - Yellowcard
(x)Ocean Avenue - Yellowcard
()Light Up The Sky - Yellowcard

'Cause i've seen you cry, way too many times when you deserved to be alive.

~ShauN~

2009-08-12T06:10:00.000-07:00

I think we have an emergency
I think we have an emergency

If you thought I'd leave, then you were wrong
Cause I won't stop holding on.

So are you listening?
So are you watching me?

If you thought I'd leave, then you were wrong
Cause I won't stop holding on.

This is an emergency
So are you listening?

And I can't pretend that I don't see this
it's really not your fault
When no one cares to talk about it[To talk about it]

Cause I've seen love die
Way too many times
When it deserved to be alive (deserved to be alive)
I've seen you cry
Way too many times
When you deserved to be alive (alive)

So you give up every chance you get
Just to feel new again

I think we have an emergency
I think we have an emergency

And you do your best to show me love,
but you don't know what love is.

So are you listening?
So are you watching me?

Well I can't pretend that I don't see this
But it's really not your fault
When no one cares to talk about it[to talk about it?]

Cause I've seen love die
Way too many times
When it deserved to be alive (deserved to be alive)
I've seen you cry
Way too many times
When you deserved to be alive (alive)

Scars, they will not fade away.
No one cares to talk about it, can we talk about it?

Cause I've seen love die
Way too many times
When it deserved to be alive (deserved to be alive)
I've seen you cry
Way too many times
When you deserved to be alive (alive)

Okay, this song just kept playing on my itunes on repeat, and it won't go away, because this song is the gospel truth.

I decided that I'm gonna be the stereotypical emo kid after graduation, long fringe to cover half my face, both sides with lip piercings, skinnies, and the national emo colour black. Not because it's cool or to gain attention, I realised that it's just me, I've tried being a metalhead before, didn't work out due to headaches from headbanging too much, I've tried being the "Nerd" before, just disgusted me, and punk was too hardcore for me, Emo would be best, and it's gonna stick that way, right now, I have the attitude, I'm just lacking the looks due to school rules.

Yep, that's the way it's gonna be just "Me against the world".

Today went fine in school, I actually fell sick after PE, no surprise though. And like in the video above, I'm as wounded as Paramore in their music video, not because of PE, fake excuse, real scars.

And all because their song is true, which probably drew me to it in the first place, because of the one sentence that says:

Because I've seen love die way too many times, when it deserved to be alive.

~ShauN~

2009-08-11T10:02:00.000-07:00

Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone
And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one

Here I go, so dishonestly leave a note for you my only one,
and i know you can see right through me so let me go and you will find someone.

Hear i go,scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one

My only one
My only one
My only one

You are my only one

~ShauN~

2009-08-10T09:57:00.000-07:00

You know who you are, this song especially the highlighted lyrics go out to you.

Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you

As years go by
I race the clock with you
But if you died right now
You know that I'd die too
I'd die too

You remind me of the times
When I knew who I was (I was)
But still the second hand will catch us
Like it always does

We'll make the same mistakes
I'll take the fall for you
I hope you need this now
Cause I know I still do

Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you

Should I bite my tongue?
Until blood soaks my shirt
"We'll never fall apart"
Tell me why this hurts so much

My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
But still we'll say, "remember when"
Just like we always do
Just like we always do

Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you

Yeah I'd spill my heart!!!
Yeah I'd spill my heart for you!!!

My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
We made the same mistakes
Mistakes like friends do

My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
We made the same mistakes
Made the same mistakes

Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you, for you

Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you

Until the day I die (Until the day I die)

Until the day I die.

~ShauN~

Sorry.

2009-08-10T07:16:00.000-07:00

Just one more moment, that's all that's needed.
Like wounded soldiers in need of healing
Time to be honest, this time I'm pleading
Please don't dwell on it, cause I didn't mean it

I can't believe I said I'd lay our love on the ground
But it doesn't matter cause I made it up.
Forgive me now
Everyday I spend away my souls inside out
Gotta be some way that I can make it up to you now, somehow.

By now you know that I'd come for you
No one but you, yes I'd come for you
But only if you told me to
And I'd fight for you I'd lie, it's true
Give my life for you
You know I'd always come for you

I was blindfolded, but now I'm seeing
My mind was closing, now I'm believing
I finally know just what it means to let someone in
To see the side of me that no one does or ever will
So if you're ever lost and find yourself all alone
I'd search forever just to bring you home,
Here and now this I vow

By now you know that I'd come for you
No one but you, yes I'd come for you
But only if you told me to
And I'd fight for you I'd lie, it's true
Give my life for you
You know I'd always come for you
You know I'd always come for you

No matter what gets in my way
As long as there's still life in me
No matter what, remember you know
I'll always come for you

Yes I'd come for you, no one but you,
Yes I'd come for you
But only if you told me to

And I'd fight for you
I'd lie, it's true
Give my life for you
You know I'd always come for you
No matter what gets in my way
As long as there's still life in me
No matter what, remember you know
I'll always come for you
I'd crawl across this world for you
Do anything you want me to

No matter what, remember you know
I'll always come for you

You know I'll always come for you

~ShauN~

2009-08-09T05:24:00.000-07:00

Do you know what's worth fighting for,
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?
Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins.

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky,
You and I

When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul
Your faith walks on broken glass
And the hangover doesn't pass
Nothing's ever built to last
You're in ruins.

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky,
You and I

Did you try to live on your own
When you burned down the house and home?
Did you stand too close to the fire?
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone

When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins.

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky

You and I.

Here I am, stuck at home, I know I should be out partying when there's a holiday tomorrow, however, my so called "friends" actually left me behind and went to nats house. So I'm all here alone, sometimes I question myself, is God really there and made them do this for a reason as part of his "plan", or am I just hated? Sucks ass.

Everyone that could make it, made it, all but me, I'm the last one standing, sometimes this really makes me think that it's just me against the world, and I find it so true.

True friends, hard to keep, hard to get, easy to lose, tonight just proved it. Sigh.

And everybody's gone, and I've been here for too long.

Yeah, indeed, I'm stuck in the past, I need to learn how to move on, regardless of the pain, ignore it, take that stride, swallow your pride, move on.

Because if I don't work for my future, and I find myself stuck in the past, I can never achieve my goals, and when I don't, I can't turn around and say

Champaign for my real friends, Real pain for my sham friends.

~ShauN~

WOOO!

2009-08-08T06:42:00.000-07:00

YES! just finished doing the mixtape singles/covers for Skyway Avenue and Break Your Little Heart, if you wanna hear them, pm me! it sounds blur, yet amazing :D

haha, these words keep blasting in my ears, through earphones,

"All the time wasted on you, all the bullshit you put me through, checking into rehab, 'cause everything that we had didnt mean a thing to you."

Because I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hungover, I love you forever, forever is over.

I'm feeling grrrrrr-reat! mass tomorrow with the rest, or at least most of them, or least, no idea.

Crap, our record needs to progress faster, at this pace we're going, the album will be ready only by next year, need to do it with more gusto. -.-!

Progress my man, progress.

Speaking of progress, plenty to elaborate about, but don't want to, because my heart wants to smile :D

WOO! Chester just nudged me for dota, and a yes i'm gonna reply, ciao! :D

~ShauN~

Hey.

2009-08-07T07:56:00.000-07:00

Dear blogger,

first time i'm writing to you in diary format. erm, well, today, i was feeling down yet up due to the events of yesterday, small yet powerful, and so i went on facebook, just to relax abit, then came this application called "God wants you to know...", i clicked on it, and it gave me this,

On this day of your life, Shaun, we believe God wants you to know...
... that it is time to finally forgive yourself.

You've carried the guilt, the shame for long enough. You've kept your wounds open for long enough. The time has to come to let go, to heal. Keep the lessons and let the pain heal. Yes, you know what we are talking about it.

true enough, this application of technology actually was able to sense what i feel and needed, no idea how, just really accurate.

and i find it very true, i've been suffering for too long, i just need to smile after a month, its been unhappy for so long, i have to let this wound recover, no matter how big it is, and no matter how much salt it got rubbed with.

i'm gonna get out of this, and i know i can, i just need to believe in myself. (:

thanks for giving this space to write :D really appreciate it, until next time :)

~ShauN~

SCREAM

2009-08-06T08:50:00.000-07:00

You get up
And somebody tells you where to go to
When you get there
Everybody's telling you what to do
Thank you, it's been another bloody Monday
And no one, is asking what you wanted anyway

Nein nein nein
Scream!,
'Til you feel it
Scream!,
'Til you believe it
Scream!
And when it hurts you, scream it out loud

Scream!,
'Til you feel it
Scream!,
'Til you believe it
Scream!
And when it hurts you
Scream it out loud
Scream (Scream it out loud)

Watch out
Stay awake, they're lurking
Obsess you, they are always working
Promising everything you never asked for
And one day it'll be too late
And you'll beg for more

Back to zero, the time's about to come
Let them know, you're not just anyone...
Scream (scream it out loud)
The time's about to come...

Scream!,
'Til you feel it
Scream!,
'Til you believe it
Scream!
And when it hurts you, scream it out loud

Scream!,
'Til you feel it
Scream!,
'Til you believe it
Scream!
And when it hurts you, scream it out loud
Scream

Shut up!

No!,
'Cause you feel it
No!,
'Cause you believe it
No!
And when it hurts you, scream it out loud

No!, no!, no!
Scream it out loud

SCREAM!

because i just fucking did.

~ShauN~

Live on.

2009-08-05T12:13:00.000-07:00

And now we're here again
Up on your roof so high
The whole world can just go to hell
For all I care tonight
I can feel the end is near
It all has come as we had feared

And if our final day has come
Let's pretend to carry on
And if the end has now begun
Live on
Live on

I just can't believe the day has come
When all the clocks stand stil
lThe horizon seems to disappear
And all our dreams are unfullfilled
I can feel the end is near
It all has come as we had feared

And if our final day has come
Let's pretend to carry on
And if the end has now begun
Live on
Live on

This is our final day
This is our final day
This is the final thunder
Up on your roof so high
Let's stay and wait for the morning
Even if it's not in sight

Has our ending just begun?
Don't care, pretend to carry on

And if our final day has come
Let's pretend to carry on
And if the end has now begun
Live on
Live on

And if our final day has come
Let's pretend to carry on
And if we stay we'll always
Live on
Live on

This is the final thunder
Up on your roof so high
Let's stay and wait for the morning
Live on
Live on
This is our final day

Live on.

~ShauN~

another day has passed.

2009-08-05T07:55:00.000-07:00

okay, so nothing much happened today, finally blogging instead of pasting vids on youtube up here :P

spend most of my day in school trying not to get shot by paper pellets, son of a bitches, go die in hell. :D

sigh, i miss thursdays old AEM periods, they were amazing.

tomorrow, may wanna bring my guitar with zelig, but lazy carry, see how.

erm, trying to think on what to say.

Farewell, I'll miss you, I'm sick of these goodbyes, 'Cause it tore us about right from the start, I'll miss you.

yeah, so tired.. i feel like i had a hang over :(

okayokay, gonna sleep soon, nights! :D

~ShauN~

The day we met was like a hit and run.

2009-08-04T09:28:00.000-07:00

Found this song really nice, sigh. The truth hurts. ;)

(hey! hey! hey! hey!)
Top down in the summer sun
The day we met was like a hit and run
And I still taste it on my tongue (taste it on my tongue)

The sky was burning up like fireworks
You made me want you oh so bad it hurt
But girl in case you haven't heard

(hey! hey! hey! hey!)
Hot sweat and blurry eyes
Were spinning round a rollercoaster ride
The world stuck in black and white

You drove me crazy every time we touched
Now I'm so broken that I can't get up
Oh girl you make me such a rush

I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hung over
I'll love you forever, forever is over
We used to kiss all night, now it's just a bar fight
So don't call me crying say hello to goodbye
Cause just one sip would make me sick
I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hung over
I'll love you forever, but now it's over

All the time I wasted on you
All the bullshit you put me through
Checking into rehab cause everything that we had
Didn't mean a thing to you

I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hung over
I'll love you forever, but now it's over
I used to be love drunk, but now Im hung over
Ill love you forever, forever is over
We used to kiss all night, now its just a bar fight
So dont call me crying say hello to goodbye
Cause just one sip would make me sick
I used to be love drunk, but now Im hung over
Ill love you forever, but now its over
Now its over
Can taste it on my tongue
Now Its over

~ShauN~

Yep.

2009-08-03T07:00:00.001-07:00

Found this song just awhile ago, one of bullet's best even without any screaming, love it, lyrics are amazing.

Tired and lonely still we stand
On a road to nowhere
Trapped in a world of endless days,
My engine's stalling (Road to nowhere)
Body and mind are breaking down
On a road to nowhere
Destiny silent, hear no sound
As I wait forever.

Farewell, I'll miss you
I'm sick of these good byes
'Cause it tore us apart right from the start
I miss you

Feelings have failed me
Left me cold
On this road to nowhere(Road to Nowhere)
Dreams are my saviors,
Save me now,
'Cause I know I'm fallin' (Oh yes)

Farewell, I'll miss you
I'm sick of these good byes
'Cause it tore us apart right from the start
I miss you

Candles burn slowly,
Flames shine so brightly
Light in the darkness,
Save me from madness again

Only the lonely,
could possibly know me
Heat keeps on rising,
Fire engulfs me again

KEEPS ON RISING

Farewell, I'll miss you
I'm sick of these good byes
'Cause it tore us apart right from the start
I miss you

Farewell, I'll miss you
I'm sick of these good byes
'Cause it tore us apart right from the start
I miss you

~ShauN

Tears dont fall, they crash around me.

2009-08-02T09:20:00.000-07:00

Lets go!

With blood shot eyes I watch you sleeping
The warmth I feel beside me is slowly fading
Would she hear me if I calls her name?
Would she hold me if she knew my shame?

There's always something different going wrong
The path I walk's in the wrong direction
There's always someone fucking hanging on
Can anybody help me make things better?

Your tears don't fall
They crash around me
Her conscience calls the guilty to come home
Your tears don't fall
They crash around me
Her conscience calls the guilty to come home

The moments died, I hear no screaming
The visions left inside me are slowly fading
Would she hear me if I calls her name?
Would she hold me if she knew my shame?

Oh! Yeah!
This battered room I've seen before
The broken bones they heal no more, no more
With my last breath I'm choking
Will this ever end I'm hoping
My world is over one more time

Lets go!

Would she hear me if i called her name?
Would she hold me, if she knew my shame?

There's always something to be going wrong
The path I walk's in the wrong direction
There's always someone fucking hanging on
Can anybody help me make things better?

Your tears don't fall
They crash around me
Her conscience calls the guilty to come home
Your tears don't fall
They crash around me
Her conscience calls the guilty to come

Better!
Your tears dont fall they crash around me
Her conscience calls the guilty to come home.

~ShauN~